EXPECTATIONS ON OTHERS CREATES FRUSTRATION.
Maybe from reading just that first sentence you'll say: “What are you talking about George? We need expectations, otherwise we would have no standards of how we want our life to look, feel and be?”
Well, if you're thinking that, then good on you, you're absolutely right..
Expectations are everywhere and expectations certainly have there place, they can be a good thing…
For example, in week one of this course, we learnt to envision what we truly wanted and then take action on creating that vision, in doing that we have created expectations for ourselves and for our partners or partners to be, so I'm not going to say throw away all our expectations.
They do happen and they are needed, they create high standards for our lives.
So when do expectations become a bad thing? When do they create frustration?
Expectations become a bad thing when we expect perfection or we expect someone to change to please us.
No one is perfect, nor will anyone ever be perfect, yet sometimes in a relationship we want our partners to be the perfect person, all day, everyday, we want them to change to suit us whenever needed, and you know what? When they show their imperfections, when they show they can't change to suit us… Well, we get frustrated.
We then don't see them in an appreciative light, we want to them to be someone else, we want them to do something different, we want them to always meet our expectations.
So let's begin to let go of these impossible to meet expectations, let go of wanting you or your partner to be perfect, let go of wanting to change them here and now, you can't force anyone to change, let go of wanting them to be a certain person, let go of taking you or them so seriously and relax in that moment back into love again..
There is only one way to make any change in the world without creating frustration and that is to be the change you want to see in the world, show and inspire through being that person, but never force it upon someone, they will just rebel against it and you'll both be left in frustration.
Plant seeds of thought in your partner if you feel something needs to change in them, then allow them to grow bit by bit in their own time, if they love you and you have
loved them fully without expectation and frustration then they will blossom fully over time.
Let's learn to become aware of our impossible expectations, let's begin to allow ourselves to be imperfect yet striving for high standards and let's allow our partners to be who they are. Yet, if needed gently with love in our hearts nudge them in the direction of growth that helps them, us and our partnership together.
There is no need for frustration, let your relationship flow, let your partner be who they are and BE the change you want to see in the world, or in them.
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