04 May 2016

Meeting Attractive Women Without Fear.

Meeting Attractive Women Without Fear

Most men have fear when meeting the women they desire, even ‘confident’, ‘cocky guys’ have it.

Most men judge others, just like women, they judge… A lot… But do you want to be most men? 

I think this simple human behaviour holds the key to all our fear in meeting the women we desire and expressing that desire.

To interact with love, we must part ourselves from the idea that judging is an okay part of being human, we must do away with judgment to really start to feel other people from the heart.

A beautiful person is a feeling, not a judgment from a simple look in their direction. Would there be anxiety in talking to a ‘exceptionally attractive person’ if you didn’t judge how they looked? But instead turned to your heart and felt?

The moment we see attractive women we start judging from our mind without any feeling of what we are actually seeing, so automatically even thinking about going and talking to this women we deem and judge as beautiful and hot, we are suddenly filled with fear, we think she is above us, or even we start thinking she thinks she’s above us, judgement brings presumption and presumption is of a fearful mind.

When we finally psyche ourselves up enough to go over to her we have fear of the outcome, fear of being rejected and it’s all because we have no empathy for her, none at all.

She is suddenly a target, an ego-boost, a mere accomplishment and that’s where fear pops up. She is no longer your equal, she is no longer one with you, she is something to be acquired, because – “If I get to sleep with this girl, I’ll feel so good, she’s an 8 or 9 at least, oh man what will the lads say when they hear about this”, naturally she feels something isn’t quite right when you are interacting with her, she isn’t really being seen, she isn’t being felt.

Do away with judgment and practice feeling, imagine seeing a beautiful woman you want to meet and instead of automatically thinking “oh wow, she’s gorgeous”, instead start to try feel her beauty without just seeing her as this hot girl to validate you, feel her beauty, feel it in your heart, appreciate her beauty and become curious about her, drop your judgment, drop your presumptions, feel your desire for her and feel what a gift your desire would be to her if expressed.

Practice non-judgement, than there won’t be any fear, there won’t be any separation between you and her. She is much more than her base layer looks you are judging, yes you can still admire her beauty, yes of course you can find her attractive, but instead of thinking it, feel it, then if you would like to express that feeling to her you can and it will come from a genuine heart.

Without judgement you can then interact with her, feeling into her heart with an intent to learn more about this beauty than an intent to acquire her beauty. Then you can listen, then you can understand,
then you can love. 

Coming from the heart is a subtle art and it requires us to begin feeling again, having empathy, having compassion, seeking more than outward beauty.

Women will respond to you more than ever, they will find this part of you attractive, it will be the thing they say “I can’t quite put my finger on it, but this guy isn’t like the others, he seems to really see me”.

Practicing non-judgement is powerful, people will relax around you, they will tell you things that afterward have them saying “Wow, I have never told anyone that before”. They will feel like they can trust you, they will feel comfortable in your presence and truly be themselves. 

Everyone judges, it’s nearly impossible not to at some point in your life, year or week to week, and even though it is a natural human habit it can and should be minimised. Practice non-judgment with everyone and every place you see, when walking the streets, going to the shop, at home with your family, or out with your friends and of course when meeting new women or with your current partner, then simply watch the magic happen.

Choose non-judgment, choose love.



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